I started this website in 2011, while sitting in a sterile hospital room next to my dad, who was fighting to live but actually dying in bits. Of course, I did not know that at the time. But time was what I had a lot of back then, so many long hours spent waiting with him as doctors, treatments, and unsure outcomes kept him stuck in that hospital bed. I wanted and needed to be there as a patient advocate and to offer family support.
In that already stressful scenario, I also had other issues to consider, including loss of a job at a publishing house I loved and had worked at for 20 years (the predictable and incredibly sad outcome of an out-of-state corporate purchase and takeover). Goodbye work, income, and a sense of identity. And then tossed into the mix was my new status as a card-carrying member of the “sandwich generation,” shuttling emotionally and physically between being an empty nester and also a caregiver for my parents. Looking back, it was all a bit much. The ability to be creative on this website temporarily took me away from all the daily awfulness.
Well, twelve years have now passed since my dad died. My mom passed in March 2020, one of the first victims of the Covid-19 pandemic. TBH, the entire family went on to see relationships ruined by all we had been through.
Here, in 2023, this project I have so enjoyed creating feels like it has probably run its course. The world is such a different place now. So all this to say that I am in the process of deciding whether to pivot focus to other topics or simply stop over the next several months. Whatever the choice, I do hope that L1OTB has been/is an interesting resource to those who have stopped by!